My father was the cornerstone of my childhood. Let me tell you something about him. He was a short man with coal black hair and beautiful blue eyes. He was Irish. He always dressed in a three piece suit and wore a Homberg hat. He shared with me the love he had for his mother. She played piano in the church. She taught my father to play the piano and cook. When she became ill he cooked for his mother, father and four brothers. He shared the great sadness his mother had to bear when death took her four years old female child. She reported the child before her death would point toward heaven and called it home. Dad had a happy childhood on the farm in West Virginia. He hunted, fished and did productive chores that the farm demanded.
Dad left the farm for the big city of Huntington, WV. He was a strong natured young man who was not afraid of hard work. He worked as a carpenter while he paid his way through business school. I recall him driving me past Kellogg Elementary School and sharing he help build the entryway frame. Later on the timeline of life my daughters attended that school briefly. Now back to Dad. He was a likable person who could communicate and laugh. The women particularly found him to be very attractive. He eventually built a wholesale candy distributing company; the largest in the state of West Virginia at that time. I was his pride and joy. My earliest memories of him are: He would hold his hand next to mine and shared how our hands were similar. I would snuggle close to him with my head resting on his chest and hear the soothing sounds of his heart beat. We were one of a kind.
Dad loved sports especially boxing, cooking and playing the piano. He wrote a song for my mother that went something like this "...I love you as the flowers love the sunshine..I love you as the roses love the dew..." I have a record of dad singing this song while playing the piano. This record was recorded on the latest recording machine purchased by my mother in the 1950s'.
Another great moment for me was when Doug and I visited dad with our first born child, Dawn. Dad held her gently in his warm arms as though she was so delicate that she might break. This brings tears to my eyes to this day remembering the love of that moment.
When I lived in NY my dad would send me beautiful letters about his childhood and always a recipe from those days. I know dad gave me the desire to cook. He also loved to garden. He built a house for my mother and myself. He had flower boxes filled with petunias. I love to plant gardens wherever possible by planting vegetables and flowers. I never learned to box though dad taught me to "...protect your face with your left hand and hit with your right hand". When I was around five years old, dad taught me about compassion. I was rather spoiled in those days. My mother purchased clothing for me from the Kiddie Korner costing several hundred dollars a month. While hanging around my dad's office some very poor children appeared. He took all of us to a store and purchased soap and toothbrushes for them. He set an account for them in the store to purchase food. I was overwhelmed. I went to school the next day with a bag full of dresses for some kids living in difficult situations. The teacher called my parents who gave their approval for the gift. After the divorce I went to Marshall University and graduated with a Master of Arts majoring in counseling. I spent the last part of my ages of 40's, 50's and 60's working with people with emotional and addiction issues. A gift from God and my earth father.
My dad passed when I was living in VA. I received a phone call from my aunt stating dad had passed from his 3rd heart attack at the age of 61. I was devastated. Doug and I drove to Huntington for his funeral. I last saw dad peacefully in his coffin. I touched his hand gently. That hand was cold...a coldness that reached my soul. I kissed and placed a red rose on his coffin.
I treasure my dad. He was not perfect...he was perfect for me. One thing I know, he loved me with his heart and soul and my love is the same for him. He gave me many gifts that I was not aware of until I looked back upon my timeline. One day in the third dimension we will sing love songs to our heavenly father, Jesus Christ.
The lesson: Love and honour your parents. Forgive them for not being perfect. Life is brief. When they are gone you want to have good memories not regrets.
